S 635 
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opy 1 



LET'S GET ACQUAINTED 



-BY- 



FLORA CLARK GARDNER. 




PRICE 35 CENTS 



Eldridge Entertainment House 

Franklin, Ohio 22a Denver, Colo. 

944 So. Logan Street 



<^ 



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with suggested songs. Drill very effective. 25c. 

Eldridge Entertainment House 

FRANKLIN, OHIO also DENVER, COLO. 

944 S. Logan St. 



^/ 



Let's Get Acquainted 



A play in four acts, suitable for Community or 
Farm Bureau Organizations. Time, present- simple 
scenerv! IVo tn 9XL ihnn>-o 



scenery; I1/2 to 2^/2 hours. 



By 

FLORA CLARK GARDNER ^ 



Copyright 1921.!Eldridge Entertainment House 



/ 



-Published by- 



ELDRIDGE ENTERTAINMENT HOUSE 

FRANKLIN, OHIO DENVER, COLO. . , 



DEC 19 19?! 



J 



Cast of Characters 



David Jones, well-to-do farmer, age about 50 
Mrs. David Jones, his wife, age about 48 
John Smith, well-to-do farmer about 50 
Mrs. John Smith, his wife, about 45 
Squire Perkins, country store keeper, middle-aged. 
Mrs. Perkins, his wife, who helps in the store 
Buster, their son, age about 11 
Deacon Sanders, age about 55; widower, recent 
comer to the vicinity ,rich and prosperous farmer 
Lucile Sanders, his daughter, young, pretty and 

clever. Keeps house for her father. 
Kufus Brown, colored; the deacon's handy man, 

chauffeur, etc. 
Thomas McGuire, elderly man, almost deaf 
Mary McGuire, his spinster daughter 
Jim Bang, poor managing, hard-up farmer 
Mrs. Bang, his wife 
Paddy O'Brien, witty Irish young man; Jones' farm 

hand 
Hiram Skinner, miserly knocker 
Widow Jolley, charming, good-natured widow, whom 

Deacon Sanders admires 
With six or more characters to represent Coon 
Creek Division in Act 3; number, age and sex left to the 
option of director. ^'^ : 

©C1.D 59430 

V 



fV"* I 



Costumes 



David Jones: overalls and straw hat in Acts 1 and 
4; well dressed in Acts 2 and 3. 

Mrs. Jones: long gingham dress and apron in Acts 
1 and 4; well-dressed in Acts 2 and 3. 

Mr. and Mrs. Smith : dressed similar to the Jones's. 

Squire Perkins: store apron, ''flour cap" in Acts 1 
and 4; well dressed in Acts 2 and 3. 

Mrs. Perkins: store apron, pencil in hair; well 
dressed in Acts 2 and 3. 

Buster : everyday overalls, ''flour cap'' in Acts 1 and 
4; well dressed in Acts 2 and 3. 

Deacon Sanders: good clothes, auto cap and gloves; 
rich, prosperous look. 

Lucile Sanders: neat ,tasty gingham dress in Acts 
1 and 4; good clothes in Acts 2 and 3. 

Rufus Brown: long linen coat, auto cap and gloves. 

Thomas McGuire: white hair, stooped shoulders, 
carries a cane; well dressed in Acts 2 and 3. 

Mary McGuire: clean dress, apron and sunbonnet; 
carries basket ; well dressed in Acts 2 and 3. 

Jim Bang: clothes rather soiled, ragged, old hat; ill- 
fitting finery in Acts 2 and 3. 

Mrs. Bang: soiled clothes, in Acts 1 and 4; ill-fitting 
finery in Acts 2 and 3. 

Paddy O'Brien: clean overalls, big hat, green tie, 
red hair, in Acts 1 and 4; 

H. Skinner: old overalls, patched or ragged; old hat, 
in Acts 1 and 4; poorly dressed in Acts 2 and 3. 

Widow Jolley: v/ell-dressed, white collar, in Acts 1 
and 4 ; clothes charming and suitable in Acts 2 and 3. 



Synopsis for Program 



ACT L— Place: Middle West, Scene: Country 
Store in Harmony Dell Neighborhood. 

ACT II. — Time: Wednesday evening following the 
Saturday P. M. in Act I. Scene: Home of Far- 
mer David Jones. 

ACT III — Time: Two months later. Scene: Com- 
munity Hall, where program is given by the 
Coon Creek Division of the Farmers' Commun- 
ity Organization. 

ACT IV— Time: About six weeks later. Scene: 
Same country store, now owned by the commun- 
ity, and managed by the efficient, experienced 
local ''store man" Squire Perkins. 



Het'g #Et ^tquainteii 



ACT I. 

(Squire Perkins' general store. Squire and Mrs, P. 
behind counter. Enter Jones,) 

Squire — Howdy, Jones, howdy? 

Jones — How do you do, Squire? How do you do, 
Mrs. Perkins. 

Squire — -Something today, Jones? 

Jones — Nope, I just thought I'd drop in, as it's get- 
ting along about time for the train to come through. 

Squire — Yes, if it's on time. 'Twere a little bit late 
yesterday. 

(Enter Smith,) 

Squire — How de do. Smith? How de do? Some- 
thing? 

Smith — Yes. Squire, got any of them auto casings 
in yet? 

Squire — Yes, jest got 'em in last evening. Come 
purty high now, when you have to buy 'em in small lots 
like I have to. I often think if you fellows 'round here 
would pull together a little better, you could save money 
on a good many things a good many times, and it would 
be more encouragement for your humble servant to stay 
in business in this neighborhood. What 'come of that 
Community Organization you'se talkin' around here all 
last spring and summer? 

Jones — Oh, we're still meeting once a month down 
at the school house. Getting along pretty good for a 
start, I guess. All big things move slow you know. 



LeVs Get Acqvuinted 



Smith — There's too many fellows pulling different 
ways to get very far on anything. 

(Enter Jim Bang.) 

Bang — How much you chargin* fer oatmeal today? 

Squire — Thirty-five cents. 

Bang — Aw, that's too high. I can get it in Chi- 
cawgo fer twenty-nine and a half. (Laughter.) 

Squire — Yes, but Bang, time you pay your postage 
both ways, to say nothin' of letter paper, 'twill amount 
up to ten or twelve cents more, and that brings your 
tw^enty-nine and a half cents up to about forty cents, five 
cents more'n' I'm askin' you. (All nod and smile.) 

(Enter Skinner.) 

Skinner — Well, there's this about bein' a farmer; 
you can raise about ill you need to eat, yourself. But 
then, Gosh blame it, the stuff's worth so much money it 
seems rank extravagance to eat it up. 

Bang — Tell you what us farmers ought to do: jest 
order our own supplies, then I'll bet you prices 'round 
here would come tumbling down some. 

Jones — Well, but Bang, we might do that on a few 
things, like flour and sugar, and such like, and pretty 
soon our little store here'd leave and then where'd we 
be when it comes to the hundred and one little necessi- 
ties we need and the many conveniences we have by hav- 
ing this wide-aw^ake little store here? Tell you, it's just 
like killing out hazel brush. You ain't going to get any- 
where, long as you keep cutting the tops off. Get at the 
roots, I tell you ! Whack at the roots ! My idee ain't to 
buck the local merchant. Us and him ought to get a little 
understanding of each other, we need each other, and 
both of us ought to stand together and whack at the 
roots of this here affair. 

Squire — I've been thinking, Jones 'stead of some of 
our folks buying their supplies up at the city, some buy- 
in' over at the junction, and some sendin' to Hangem & 
Skinnem, and some wantin' your Community Organiza- 



Let's Get Acqvmnied 



tion to order, some of you buying here, why don't your 
Community folks stick together, get big orders from one 
concern or another, use me as your humble servant to 
take orders, and carry on your work around here, use my 
store and storage house as yours, build your own ele- 
vator. As No. 79 and No. 6 both stop here every day, 
there's lots of possibilities 'round here, for better busi- 
ness and a better living for you and me, too. 

Jones — I've thought of something similar to that, 
several times, myself. 

(Enter Paddy O'Brien.) 

Smith — So have I. You're meaning. Squire, for the 
community to own the buildings, hire you to do the or- 
dering, book work and see that things are kept running 
straight, around here, or how? 

Squire — Yes, something on that plan. 

Jones — Tell you, gentlemen, my views on this mat- 
ter are like the Squire said. None of us is going to get 
anywhere as long as we keep pulling in different direc- 
tions; 'nother thing is, we don't want to put the Squire 
out of business here. He's a mighty fine fellow to have 
in our midst ; he's a local fellow, not a big-bug who makes 
a swell living and wears diamonds and lets us pay for 
'em; no, siree, we want to keep the Squire right here at 
his post. If he's willing and the community ^vants to 
buy his buildings and fixtures, that's all right; his ex- 
perience would be worth a heap to the community, too, 
and it sure ain't our idee to put him out of business. 

Squire— 'Weil, you fellows talk this over, and surely 
we can make some arrangements to suit you and me, too, 
and we'd all be better by it. 

Jones and Smith — All right. Squire, we'll do that. 

Paddy — Them's mj sentiments, too. Get acquainted, 
more acquainted. Get acquainted with your neighbors. 
You might like 'em. (Laughter,) 

Squire — I see you got rid of that old blind mule, 
Paddy. 



Let's Get Acquainted 



Paddy — Shure an' I did. 

Smith — You swindled that guy in the deal, too, don^ 
it weigh on your conscience? 

Paddy — Don't it weigh on my conscience? 

Sviith — Yes, weigh on your conscience. 

Paddy — Shure an' I've had that old mule on my 
hands and mind so long 'twill be a relief to get it on my 
conscience. (All laugh,) 

Jones — Paddy and me's feeling pretty good. Them 
hogs he's been feedin' for me, we sold through the Ship- 
ping Association last week, and they topped the market. 

Squire — Fine. Suppose you fed them that good 
corn you raised last summer, Paddy. Did you use it 
ground or mixed, or feed 'em corn in the ear? 

Paddy — Shure, an* I didn't feed 'em corn in the ear; 
I put it in the trough where it belongs. (All laugh,) 

Squire — But say! how about this new idea, raising 
hogs quicker with tankage and shorts? 

Paddy — Nothin' to it. If you want to raise a hog 
real quick, get a derrick. (All laugh heartily.) 

(Enter McGuire, coughing.) 

All — How do you do, Mr. McGuire? 

McGMre — How de do, folks? How de do? 

Jones — See you have a cold. 

McGuire — Me? Why, no, Fm not cold. Fm not cold. 

Jones — I see you got a cold, (speaking loudly.) 

Mc. — Old? No, not very old, coming sixty-three^ 
(waves cane) spry as a cricket, though. Got a grand- 
father still a-living, I have. 

Jones — (loudly) On your father's or mother's side? 

Mc. — On my father's or mother's side? Oh, he var- 
ies, sir. He sticks up for both of them. Believes in be- 
ing neutral, you see. (Laughter.) 

Bang — We've had some damp, chillin' weather this 
last week, but this's been a scorcher of a day. (Loudly, 
to Mc.) Didn't need any stove up today. 



Let's Get Acquainted 



Mc, — Stoved up? Me stoved up? 

Bang — No, I said we didn't need a stove up. 

Mc, — (hobbles around, waves cane) Stoved up! 
Stoved up ! Well I may be a wee bit stoved up, I'm spry 
as a cricket, though, I tell you. 

Bang — Here comes that fellow, Sanders, that moveql 
in in the spring, he don't seem to give a heck for society. 

Smith— Who 1 the deacon? Why, he attends our 
Farm Community meetings and church regular. What 
makes you think he don't give a heck for society? 

Bang — Why, many's the time he misses a hull two 
weeks without comin' down to see the train in once. 

Squire — The Deacon's a mighty fine fellow. Got a 
mighty fine daughter, too. Don't you say so^ Paddy 
O'Brien? 

Paddy- — You shure said it — just my style. 

''Some belles have appealing beauty, of a kind that 
knows no flaw; 
But the belle that's worth the ringing, peels po- 
tatoes for her pa." 

Skinner — (teasingly) Now, Paddy, don't you get to 
day-dreaming around too much. That young Van Wee- 
ber, from the city's got a shine on Lucile, too. An' say! 
talk about style. Don't it strike you as awful the way 
the girls are showin' their ankles, now-a-days? 

Mc, — (vuts hand to ear) Ankles? 

Skinner — ^Yes, ankles. Wearing them short skirts, 
you know. 

Mc, — Ankles! (ivaves cane) Granny! They're go- 
ing out of style, now it's knees! 

(Enter Deacon Sanders, drawing off auto gloces,) 

All — How do you do, Deacon Sanders? 

Deacon— (politely) How do you do? Squire, have 
you any razor blades in? 

Squire — You bet. More than I want. How many 
can I sell you? 



10 Let*s Get Acquainted 



Deacon — Oh, a couple of packages will be all right. 

Smith — What do you think of that barber that was 
here a couple of months in the spring, Deacon? 

Deacon — What did i think of him ? 

Smith — Yes, what did you think of him? Wasn't 
he an absent-minded fellow? 

Deacon — (smilingly) Absent-minded? He surely 
was. W^hy the last time I went to get shaved he pinned 
a paper around my neck and gave me a towel to read. 

(Everyone laughs heartily) 

Deacon — Say; how are you off for sugar today, 
Squire? 

Squire — Oh, I got in three barrels the other day. 
How much do you want. Deacon? 

Deacon — Guess Til take a barrel of it. FU send my 
man Ras, over for it in a little while. 

Squire — All right, Deacon. 

Deacon — All right. Squire. Good day. Good day, 
gentlemen. (Exit.) 

Skinner — (picking up flimsy nic-nac) What's the 
use of this article. Squire? 

Squire — Don't know, lest it was intended for a 
Christmas present. (Laughter,) 

(Enter Buster Perkins, running, much out of 
breath.) 

Squire — Hey, here, son! What are you running in 
here like that, for? 

Buster — Fm trying to keep two fellows from fight- 
ing. Pa. 

Squire — Why son, who are the two fellows 

Buster — Billy Johnson and me! (All laugh.) 

Squire — You stay right here, now. Buster. 

Mrs. Perkins — (to Paddy) Don't you think Buster 
looks like his papa? 



Let's Get Acquainted 11 

Paddy — Yes, but I don't think that^s what's the mat- 
ter with him. (laughter,) 

(Enter LucUe, Paddy straightens up, adjusts cap, 
and smiles at her.) 

All — How do you do, Lucile? 

Lucile — (breezily) Hello, everybody, (shyly) How 
do you do, Mr. O'Brien? 

Paddy — How's everything getting along up at your 
house, Lucile? 

Lucile — Oh, Pm getting along all right, (all smile) 
Weren't you surprised to hear about my horse running 
away with me, the other day? 

Paddy — Not a bit of it. I'd dp the same thing my- 
self, if I had the chance, (laughter.) 

Lucile — (innocently, to Squire) Squire Perkins, 
that flour you sold us the other day was tough. 

Squire — Tough? (in surprise.) 

Lucile— Ye^y tough. 

Squire — (doesn't understand. Scratches head) You 
say the flour was tough 

Lucile — Yes, it was awful tough. Why I, myself, 
made Daddy some pie with it, and he could hardly cut it. 
(Enter Mary McGuire) Why, here's Mary McGuire. Hel- 
lo, Mary, how are you? 

Mary — Sure, an' I'm fine as the hair on your pretty 
head but me brother-in-law, Jimmy Dugan, over in Rush- 
ville's a moighty sick man. And Oi keep thinkin' of'm 
all the while. 

Lucile — Well, that's too bad, Mary. 

Mary — He's now got one foot in the grave, but the 
doctors all say he's good for a year yet. 

Lucile — Is that so? And how is that? 

Mary — Shure an' they've had four doctors, an' each 
of'm give him three months to live. 

Lucile — It's too bad, Mary, but how are your sister 
and the children? 



12 . Let's Get Acquainted 

Mary — Shure, they're fine and the children's all well 
an' Michael growin' so. You just ought to see him, ivery- 
body thinkin' he's older than what he is. 

Liicile — Is that so? 

Mai^y — That's the livin' truth, and he shure does 
look older than what he is — but then he ain't. (All smile) 

(Enter RasJ 

Squire — Howdy, Ras. The sugar's right back here. 

(Exeunt Squire and Ras, through hack door. Squire 
returns. Enter Mrs, Bang,) 

Mrs, P, — Something today, Mrs. Bang? 

Mrs, Bang — I want a spool of cotton thread. Charge 
it, please. (Gets thread. Exit.) 

(Enter Widovj J., smiling and bright.) 

Mrs, P, — ^Why here's Widow Jolley ! How do you do, 
Mrs. Jolley? Do you always keep so sunny and cheerful? 

Widow — Me sunny and cheerful? 

Mrs. P. — Yes, you always seem sunny and cheerful. 
How do you do it? 

Widoiv — (laughs) Why, don't you know that a wom- 
an can have a good time, thinking what a good time she 
would have if she were having it? (All laugh.) 

(Enter Mrs. Jones and Mrs. Smith, talking to each 
other. Appear near front of stage.) 

Mrs. Jones — Yes, it will be all right with me, Mrs. 
Smith, to have our division of the Community Organiza- 
tion meet with me on Wednesday evening. I hope it's 
nice weather, and everyone can come out. We've been 
having such good, neighborly times, all spring and sum- 
mer. 

Mrs. Smith — Yes, it's just what we farm folks need 
— to get together more, and have more good times to- 
gether. 

Paddy — Them's my sentiments. Let's get acquaint- 
ed. (Looks at Lucile.) More acquainted. 

Mrs. S. — Yes, I've often said when you do something 



Let's Get Acquainted 13 

IN and FOR your community it makes you love it. 

Mrs, J, — And when we do do something worth while 
for our community, we are better off for it and so is the 
community. 

Mrs. S, — Yes, these merry social times we have at 
our club meeting, liven us up and keep us young with 
our children — keep us from growing hard and having 
critical feelings toward each other. 

Mrs, J, — Yes, many's the time we'd be more sympa- 
thetic and helpful to others, if we only understood them 
better — knew the trials and temptations that were theirs, 
and the burdens they were carrying on their shoulders. 
(To all) Yes, I hope it's a nice evening, and you can all 
come over Wednesday evening. We're going to have a 
social good time and get better acquainted. 

Paddy— Them's my sentiments — Let's get acquaint- 
ed. (Looks at Lucile,) Get better acquainted. 

CURTAIN 



ACT II. 

(Living room of Farmer Jones' home. Mr, and Mrs, 
Jones discovered welcoming guests. Shaking hands and 
greeting all cordially.) 

Mrs, J, — Just let me take your hats folks, and every- 
body find chairs. (Lays ivraps on stand in same room; 
all are seated; nod to each other,) 

M^s, J. — (continuing) I'm so glad to see all of you. 
Guess about everyone's here, too; so we may as well be- 
gin our frolic and fun right away. What do you all say? 

All — Yes, let's do. All right. Yes, we're ready, (etc.) 

Mrs. J. — (showing program for evening's enteHain- 
ment, which is written on heavy paper, about 10"xl2") 
Folks, here's our program. Lucite will explain the games. 



14 Let's Get Acqiuiinted 

Lucile — The first thing we have planned for you to 
do is for everybody to greet everybody here tonight. 
Shake hands v^ith a *'How do you do." Our game is 
**Candy, candy, v^ho has the candy?'' Someone has in 
their possession a box of candy, and is going to count all 
who shake hands with them, the fifteenth person who 
shakes hands with the holder gets the candy. (All enter 
game enthusiastically, laughing, shaking hands, back and 
forth.) 

Mary — Here's number fifteen — and here's your can- 
dy. 

(Winner passes it a'^ound. All langh and are seated.) 

Lucile — Next is "Who wants a date?" 

Mary — Shure, I can tell you — it's Paddy O'Brien. 

(All laugh.) 

Paddy — How about yourself, Mary McGuire? 

Mary — Oh, go 'long wid ye, Paddy O'Brien. Shure, 
the mon Oi'd have niver's been born yit, and his mother's 
dead. (Laughter.) 

Lucile — We have here some strings for this game. 
In the middle of each is a date, each with a string, is 
given to two persons. They must not use their hands, — 
just their mouths, and w^hoever gets to the date first, gets 
it. 

Smith — What do you say, Deacon, let's you and me 
try that. 

Deacon — All right, here we go. (They step to the 
front of stage and each tries to get it. All laugh and en- 
joy the game.) 

Squire — I'd like to see how much Paddy wants a 
date. 

Widow J. — ^Yes, and Lucile! (Laughter.) 
All — Paddy and Lucile! Paddy and Lucile! 
Paddy-. — What do you say, Lucile? Want a date? 
Lucile — (rather shyly) Oh, I don't know — 
All — Go on, Lucile! Yes, Lucile, go on. 



Let's Get Acquainted 15 



Lucile — Well, all right, this time. (They step to the 
front and each tries to get the date, Paddy gets it and 
divides with Lucile, Much laughter,) 

Mary — Paddy, you were so successful I think you 
ought to sing that song— that club song. 

Paddy — Never ! 

All — Yes, Paddy, let's hear it. 

Paddy — I can't sing unless I have a whole brass 
band to play the air — 

All — Oh, yes you can. Let's hear it. 

Paddy — Promise me not to run me off and I'll sing 
it this once. It's my own origin, so have mercy. (^A^Z smile 
and look at him eagerly. Sing to tune ''Little Brown 
Jug:') 

As I go toiling on my farm, 
I think of this club as a perfect charm ; 
This speedily drives all care away, 
Ha, ha, ha! hurrah! hurray! 

Mary — Paddy O'Brien, don't you iver be tellin' me 
ag'in that you can't sing. Shure, an' I know now. 
(Laughter,) 

Lucile — Next is 'Topcorn Festival." Two persons 
are blindfolded, and each tries to feed the other pop corn. 
Who is first? 

Widow J, — I'd like to see David Jones and John 
Smith try that. 

Mrs, J, — Yes, and we'd like to see the widow and the 
Deacon. (Chairs are put toward front of stage for both 
couples, who feed fiercely. Everybody laughs heartily. 
When done — ) 

Mrs, P, — (to audience) I think the widow did her 
best to feed the deacon well. 

Mary — (aside, toward audience) Yes, and talk about 
the deacon makin' a good provider for the widow. He's 
proved his provision ability right here and now. 



16 Let's Get Acquainted 

Mc, — (laughing) Shure and Fve had the laugh of 
me life this night. (Laughs again and wipes eyes) Fm 
shure not feelin' old, I tell you, Fm just as spry as a 
cricket. (Waves cane and laughs,) 

Mrs, J, — Well, as iFs getting late, we'll hav^ a little 
treat, and then our regular business. (Passes fresh 
fruit, popcorn balls or anything preferred. As treat is 
being passed and eaten everyone talks and laughs, then) 

Jones — (to Squire) I hear Josh Weather's had a 
run-away the other day. 

Squire — Yes, 'twas too bad. 

Jones — Queer how horses will get so scared of auto- 
mobiles. 

Squire — Queer ? 

Jones — Yes, queer. 

Squire — I don't think it's queer. What would you 
think if you saw my pants and coat come walkin' down 
the road with nothin' in them? (Laughter,) 

Lucile- — Poor things! I just love horses. 

Paddy — (leaning forward) Did you say you loved 
them? 

Lucile — Yes, I just love horses. 

Paddy — How glad I am. Perhaps you've noticed 
(clears throat) Fm a little hoarse, (hearty laughter.) 

Lucile — (disgusted) Oh, Paddy, hush! 

Mrs, J, — I guess we are ready for the business meet- 
ing, now, Mrs. Smith. 

Mrs. S. — All right. If all will now come to order, 
we'll have the reading of the minutes of the last meet- 
ing by our secretary. 

Paddy — (as secretary) Harmony Dell Club of The 
Farmers' Community Organization, met at Deacon San- 
ders* home on June 3rd. Music and games helped all to 
spend a very pleasant evening. At this meeting the 
men signed up for 200 lbs. of salt, also agreed to order 
500 lbs. of twine. Harmony Dell Division went on rec- 



I 



Let's Get Acquainted 17 



ord favoring reduction of high salaries. Motion made 
by Deacon Sanders to go fishing on Tuesday, (all laugh) 
providing enough fish-worms could be found to bait the 
hooks. Motion made to have this an all-day meeting, 
and everyone come and have Deacon Sanders cook the 
fish for dinner. Motion carried. Motion made and car- 
ried for adjournment, (All laugh,) 

Mrs, J. — rd like to remind you of the three-day 
cooking and canning school, next Wednesday, Thursday 
and Friday. We're hoping all the women and girls can 
attend. This instruction is free to Community members. 

Mrs. S. — And you know, we talked about the house- 
keepers of this club purchasing 4 yards of white oilcloth 
for our threshing time table cloths, and send it each 
place the threshing crew eats. Twill save about ten of 
us washing and ironing our linen ones, and Squire Per- 
kins says we may have the four yards for $1.40, which 
will be about 14 cents each, and who wouldn't give 14 
cents rather than wash and iron those big threshing 
time table cloths? Then, too, the women of this club 
are going to plan our threshing meals together this 
year. The last day of our cooking school next week, we 
are going to plan our big meals and compare plans to- 
gether, so that the men will get a change of food every 
day and altogether get the usual variety; and instead of 
the old way of every woman serving five kinds of cake, 
seven kinds of pie, 14 kinds of pickles, and 57 varieties 
of everything else, and then dread threshing time, and be 
dead tired when her meal is ove^*, we're going to plan to^ 
gether to have just as good meals with lots less work, 
and be ready to greet harvest time with a smile. 

Deacon — I think this is a splendid idea you women 
folks have. 

Paddy — It sure is. 

All Women — Yes, we like it. (All rise and prepare 
to go, get own hats, etc.) 

Mrs. J. — Fm so glad you all came this evening. 



18 Let's Get Acquainted 

All — (saying various things) WeVe had a fine time. 
Glad we came, too. Had such a good time, etc 

Mr. and Mrs. J, — (as all leave) Come again. Good 
night. Good night. 

CURTAIN 



ACT III. 

(Curtain opens on all assembled at the hall or the 
school house, ready to hear the evening's entertainment 
and Community business meeting,) 

Pres. Jones — We'll now hear the minute-s of our last 
meeting. 

Secretary Mrs. Smith — Minutes of previous meeting 
of Elder County Farmers' Community Organization. 
Meeting called to order by President Jones. Minutes of 
last meeting read and approved. Motion made and car- 
ried that this Community Organization purchase a new 
threshing outfit this fall. Motion made that we secure 
Squire Perkins' store buildings and store houses and re- 
build the elevator for our farm community needs. Also, 
the supervision of Squire Perkins as manager of same. 
Carried. Adjournment motion made and carried. Sarah 
Smith, Secretary. 

Pres, Jones — We now will have the program by the 
•Coon Creek Division. 

(Song by all) 

BOOSTER SONG 



(Tune, ''Red White and Blue) 
Oh, here's to our brave, sturdy farmer 
The staff of our nation is he. 
His life's very busy and happy, 
From envy, hate and malice how free. 



Let's Get Acquainted 19 



He's a hustler from morning till evening, 
And does something worth while every day. 
Oh, the farmer, the farmer, forever, 
Three cheers for the farmer, we say. 

Chorus : 

Three cheers for the farmer, we say. 
They do something worth while every day. 
Oh, our farmers, our farmers forever, 
Three cheers for our farmers, we say, 

Yes, here's to our brave, sturdy farmers, 
Who have for their watchword, progress. 
For bumper crops they're charmers. 
Whatever they tackle sure to be success. 
Just to be sure they'll be up and doing 
And boost for everything that's best, 
Our farmers, our farmers, forever. 
Take the lead, measure fine, every test. 

Chorus : 



HOME DEPARTMENT SONG 



(Tune, ''Old Black Joe'') 
Gone are the days. 
When we blindly worked like slaves. 
Our house work to do, 
Home makers' tasks all, too. 
But now, through our state. 
There is offered us much aid. 
If we get busy, try our best 
New ways to do. 

Chorus : 

We're trying, we're trying, 
Better ways oui work to do. 
Our Home Department meetings 
Surely help us, too. 



20 Let's Get Acquainted 



Home makers agree 
Our calling's best on earth. 
This world's destiny 
Is cuddled at our hearth. 
So, for better homes 
We're going to work and plan 
For better homes and farm folks 
We united stand. 
Chorus : 



DEDICATION SONG 



(Tune, ''Yankee Doodle*') 
Once on a time there was a man, 
■He was a first-rate farmer; 
He searched his pocket for a five, 
Then gave it like a charmer. 
That bought this hall and store, it did, 
By working all together, 
Ours to have and to enjoy 
In every kind of weather. 
When folks are trying, let's just try. 
Do all we can around here. 
Just put our shoulders to the wheel, 
Or we, alone, will flounder. 
Can we do more that really helps? 
What think you, right out yonder? 
We want to make in every way 
Farm life safer and sounder. 
We've all enjoyed past meetings here. 
And hope to in the future. 
Much good we learn, while here each time; 
Enjoy ourselves? We do, sure! 
We're glad this place can be called ours. 
Now let's all boost together. 
Ours to have and to enjoy 
In every kind of weather. 



LeVs Get Acquainted 21 

(Any number of recitations, speeches, musical num- 
bers, dialogs, etc, may be used left to option of director.) 

(Business meeting held when program ends. Ev- 
eryone is enthusiastic) 

Pres, Jones — I think we owe a vote of thanks to the 
Coon Creek Division for this good program this even- 
ing. (All clap hands,) The Hickory Grove Division will 
put on our next program. (All cheer.) Are there any 
reports of committees or unfinished business this even- 
ing? 

Deacon — I make a miotion that a committee be ap- 
pointed to secure a short course or training school for 
this organization this winter. This course to include 
instruction in both agriculture and domestic science. 

Paddy — I second the motion. 

Pres. Jones — All in favor raise the right hand. 
Contrary, the same. Carried . I appoint Deacon San- 
ders, John Smith and Mrs. Perkins on this conmiittee. 
Any other business? (Waits.) If none, we'll adjourn. 

(All rise, laugh^ and are very enthusiastic.) 

CURTAIN 



ACT IV. 

(Same country store, now oivned by community and 
managed by the efficient, experienced, local store man. 
Squire Perkins. Time, about six weeks later than in 
Act III. In the store are Sqidre and Mrs. P., and Butter, 
Mr. and Mrs, Jones, Mr. and Mrs. Smith, Mr. and Mrs. 
Jim Bang, Skinner and Ras.) 

Jones — This new plan of us and our local merchant 
working together is working out pretty good, isn't it? 

Squire — We're all coming out better by it too. 

Smith — It's taken considerable work and planning 
to get it all to going good, but everybody's took a-hold 



22 Let's Get AcqvMnted 



good and give liberally of their time, ideas, and money, 
and we've- pulled together well it seems to me. 

Mrs SmUt^It surely is true that sitting down, 
complaining that the real community spirit is a thmg ot 
the past isn't the way to bring it back. And usually the 
happiest people in the neighborhood are the ones who 
fry to make others happy, too, and ^vhen things do look 
dull we've got to be courageous enough to stand alone, 
and' not wait to be backed up by all the crowd; because 
we may not see it at first, but almost always there s op- 
portunities hiding behind the difficulties, and it pays to 

hunt them out. u .. i, ni 

Ras—3osh Weathers says he calculates that hell 

done make so well by dis dat his wust trouble m makin 

out his income tax will be his conscience, (laughter.) 
Squire— Oh, I wouldn't pay too much attention to 

Josh Weathers' joshin'. 

Ras—3osh Weathers' tongue am like a chauffeur. 

Smith — How is that? 

i?as— Always on de run and sometimes runs folks 
down. (Slaps knee and laughs.) 

Jones— Tell you what, Josh may not be as big a fool 
as he'd make you think he is. 

Ras—U dat am de case he's got lots to be thankful 
for den. (Laughs.) 

jones-Ras, your talk around here don't have any 
more effect than a flea bite. 

Ras— (scratching head) A flea bit? 

Jones— Yes, your talk don't have any more effect on 
folks than a flea bite. 

Ras—l done knows dat, but like de flea bite it 
keeps folks scratchin' anyhow. (Ras laughs heartily. 

Others laugh, too.) 

Mc— (looking up from paper) I see, Ras, that down 
in Africa, a man can buy a wife for $4.00. , , , <. 

Ras— Four dollars! Boy, alive! If a man had dat 
much money, he wouldn't need no wife. (Laughter.) 



Let's Get Acquainted 23 

Smith — I thought, Ras, you was going to marry that 
Dinah girl, last summer. 

Ras — Well, I was, but she done flunked de las' min- 
ute, wouldn't give me de money for to git de license wid. 

Smith — Well, but Ras, do you suppose you*d make a 
good provider? 

Ras — I jes' ain't nothin' else but a good providin' 
man, sir. I'd git her some mighty swell furniture, pro- 
vidin' I had de money, and I'se sure to git de money pro- 
vidin' I sticks to work, and I'se sure to stick to work pro- 
vidin' de job suits me. You never saw a more providin' 
man in all your days. (All laugh,) 

Jon'es — Say, they tell me that the deacon lost his 
fine Airedale dog. How did it happen, Ras? 

Ras — He done swallowed de tape measure, sir, 

Jones — (jokingly) I suppose he died by inches then. 

Ras — No, sir, he done went back of de house, an' 
died by de yard, sir, died by de yard. (Laughter,) 

iJas— Well, I thinks I'd better be gwine 'long. Let 
me see — (scratches his head) — ^what war it all de dea- 
con and Miss Lucile tol' me for to git. (Gets list and 
reads,) A bottle of lineament, a pound of tea, a box of 
carpet tacks, a dozen lamp wicks, a new fire shovel. Aw, 
I don't need any writ out list, I members it so well. 
(Counting on firigers) A dozen carpet tacks, a pound of 
lineament, a sack of fire shovels, no I done got that gom- 
fuzzled — a dozen fire shovels, a new carpet tack, a bottle 
of tea, a sack of lineament — no, dat ain't it, tall. Whar 
am dat list 'gain? (Finds list again and reads) a bottle 
of lineament, a pound of tea, a box of carpet tacks, a doz- 
en lamp wicks, an' a new fire shovel. Dat am de way. I 
done knowed I'd git it right. You can jes' 'pend on your 
Uncle Rastus ever time. (Gets packages and leaves the 
store.) 

(Enter Mary McGuire and her father, Thomas Me- 
Guire.) 

Mary- — I've six dozen eggs in my basket, Squire, 



24 Lefs Get Acquainted 

and I'll take it up in sugar. (Sets basket on counter. Mc, 
begins coughing hard,) 

Smith — I see you have your cold, yet. What are 
you taking for it? 

Mc. — (smiling) Oh, I ain't decided yet how much 
I'll take. Gonna make me an offe^? 

Smith — Not unless it's advice. (Laughs.) Here's 
a new one on the summary of life : man's life is summed 
up in thres words (counts on fingers.) Hatched, matched, 
dispatched. (All laugh.) 

Jones — Say. Those fellows over in Coon Creek Di- 
vision had a **Silo Circle" formed this fall on those silos 
they put up over there, ordering together and they 
saved $5 a thousand on lumber and got a rebate on nails 
and cement. 

Squire — Yes and over in Turkey Run Division, 
they're going to have a crow hunt the 15th of this month. 
They say there's a lot of hog cholera across the river and 
south, and that crows are a sure carrier of that disease. 

Jones — Yes, and over in Riverview Division, they're 
going to have a corn show this fall. Fine idea, too. 

Mrs. Smith — How does everyone like the suggestion 
boxes — the one on the store door, here, and the one on 
the Community Hall door? 

All — Oh, they're all right. Just fine. 

Mrs. Jones — At our Home Department meetings, we 
are getting the pad and pencil habit started and going 
well. Every woman is urged to bring her pencil and . 
paper and there she jots down formulas, plans, measure- 
ments, requirements and the many, many things well 
worth remembering and putting into practice when she 
gets home. 

All — That's a fine idea, too. 

Squire — Say. I tell you I like this new store-keep- 
ing plan. I handle twice the orders I used to, have less 
worry and get more out of it, too. 

Jones — What I like about as well as anything is our 



Let's Get Acqiminted 25 

elevator and storage house. We can haul our stuff in, 
when the roads are good or when we have the most time, 
or whenever we please, and as it's a big job looking after 
this end of the aifair, we're mighty lucky to have as 
efficient, experienced a man as our Squire Perkins here. 

Mrs, Smith: — I think we've all enjoyed being togeth- 
er more, and working together more. We get more work 
done, too. And we get more out of life in a social way. 
The more we put into life the more we get out of it. And 
folks get along better when they're acquainted, you know. 

Mrs. P. — Here comes Deacon Sanders and Widow 
Jolley in the deacon's new car! 

Mary — I think before the winter's over we'll think 
the deacon and the widow's got about as much good out 
of getting better acquainted, as anyone. Wedding bells 
will be ringing there some of these days — you just see. 

All — Oh, do you suppose? 

Jim Bang — 'Nother good thing — this community 
workin' 'round here's done. It's woke a lot of us up and 
we've found out there's a whole lot more to farming 
when we get a little better management about it. 

Mrs. Bang — ^Yes, what Jim an' the rest of you said 
is very true. And I've found out I can make our hard- 
earned dollars go farther since I've been to some of these 
cooking and sewing demonstrations. 

Mc, — It's just this way — long as you stick together 
f er a square deal for everyone, for our homes, our farms 
and our communities, it's a grand good thing. 

(Enter Deacon and Widow, followed by Paddy with 
Lucile, as Mc, is finishing. All four are very happy.) 

Paddy — The best part of this whole thing is / found 
Mrs. Paddy O'Brien. Them always was my sentiments — 
LET'S GET ACQUAINTED. 

(All laugh, cheer and throw confetti.) 

CURTAIN 



YOU WILL BE GLAD TO KNOW OF 

THESE NEW PLAYS 

Training Mary 

By Mary Shaw Page. A bright 1-act play with sim* 
pie stage setting. William, husband of Mary, essays 
to train Mary, especially along the lines of correcting 
carelessness. As 1» always the case, William gets in 
deep water, but finally wades out. 2 msdes, 4 fe» 
males, and plays about 45 minutes. Price, 25c. 

The Hired Man's Courtship 

By Alice Cripps. A short comedy-drama in 2 acts. 
Captain Edwards tires of wealth and the city, emd 
procures work on Horton*s farm, only to find that the 
farmer's daughter is an old sweetheart. Because of 
an intrigue on the part of the captain^s cousin, an es- 
trangement takes place, which ends happily when the 
captain finds the source of certain stories and re- 
futes them. Aunt Hepsey, Jim and Ezra (colored), 
add comedy to the • play. Plays about 45 minutes, 
and is for 3 males and 3 females. Price, 25c. 

Merely Anne Marie 

A comedy in 3 acts by Beulah King. 3 males, 5 fe- 
males. Time, 2y2 hours. The scenes are laid in a 
fashionable boarding house, and the characters are all 
distinct types and worth while. A successful play- 
wright, desiring to escape notoriety, seeks seclusion 
at Mrs. Teague's and becomes the hero of Anne Ma- 
rie, the dining room maid. The dialogue is bright, 
the situations clever and the story ends happily. 35c. 

A Bit of Scandal 

By Fannie Barnett Linsky. Comedy-drama in 2 acts. 
Francina, who is to play at the recital, composes her 
own number. On the evening of the recital, Mary 
Sherman, who precedes her on the program, plays 
Francina's compositions, which she has stolen. The 
reasons for the theft all come out later and of course, 
all ends well. Nine characters. Plays about 1 hour. 
Price, 35c. 

Miss Burnett Puts One Over 

By Ethelyn Sexton. A rollicking 1-act girls* play for 
6 characters. Barbara's mother has a friend, Ann Bur- 
nett, who is to visit the girls at college, with the in- 
tention of giving a generous sum to the school. The 
girls, wishing o gain her good will, practice their 
"^manners." Miss Burnett, however, appears in dis- 
guise and has much fun at their expense. All ends 
well and the school gets the money. Plays about 45 
minutes. Easy setting and costumes. Price, 25c. 

Eldridge Entertainment House 

FRANKLIN, OHIO also DENVER, COLO. 

944 S. Logan St. 



^ 



New Juvenfle Entertainments 



A-B-C-Capers 

By Soemple. Here is an attractive and novel number 
for the Primary Grades or Kindergarten. Little Tim*s 
despair in not being able to master letters is turned 
to keen interest by the antics of the alphabet troupe. 
Plays about 20 minutes. Price, 25c. 

Emily's Dream 

By Mary Frix Kidd. This is the story of a Geogra- 
phy lesson, which, instead of being irksome, was» 
through the medium of a Good Fairy, made very in- 
teresting. This is done by presenting a Geographical 
Pageant. For a large number of children, who pre- 
sent drills, exercises, etc., in costumes of different 
nations. Time, about 1 hour. Price, 25c. 

The Love Flower 

By Bell Elliott Palmer. A very pretty exercise for 6 
or 10 girls and 1 boy. Suitable for Children's Day or 
Easter, and can be given either in of out of doors. 
Time, 10 minutes. Price, 15c. 

The Silver Sandals 

By Banche Thompson. Ths is a charming new play 
for 6 boys, 5 girls, fairies, peasants, attendants, etc. 
The Princess is downhearted and refuses to be con- 
soled. The fiddler plays, peasants do folk-dances, fai- 
ries drill, but not until she gets the silver sandals is 
she contented. Plays 1 hour or more. Price, 25c. 

When Betty Saw the Pilgrims 

By Margaret Howard. A pretty story showing how 
dissatisfied Betty was cured by her mother, who tells 
the story of the hardships of the Pilgrims, which is 
illustrated by ten tableaux. Large numbers of chil- 
dren can be used. Plays about 30 minutes. Price, 
25c. 

Princess Rosy Cheeks 

By Effie Sammond Balph. A "good health" play for 
children, which is very impressive. Introduces Fresh 
Air Fairies, Soap and Water Fairies, Tooth Brush 
Brigade, Food Fairies, Rest Fairies, and others. Good- 
sized cast required with two older children. Plays 
about 1 hour. Price, 35c. 

Queen Loving Heart 

By Jean Ross. A splendid children's play, teaching 
many good lessons. A pretty story of the crowning of 
Loving Heart, her capture by the Indians and sub- 
sequent release, because of her kindness. Can be tised 
for May Day play. 1 1 speaking parts, Indians, etc. 
Plays about 45 minutes. Price, 25c. 

Eldridge Entertainment House 

FRANKLIN, OHIO also DENVER, COLO. 

944 S. Logan St. 



— - ^-^ ■ 



Some Bright New 

Christmas Material 



First Aid to Santa 

By Ethel Sexton. A mighty bright playlet for 3 boys, 
2 girls and 10 acting dolls (girls and boys). Plays 30 
or 40 minutes. Price, 25c. 

The Christmas Chain 

By Lillian Pearson. A pretty sketch for 14 or more 
children. The Christmas Angel shows her complete 
Christmas Chain to two selfish sisters w^ith happy re- 
sults. Plays about 20 minutes. Price 25c. 

How the Christmas Song Was Found 

By Lillian Pearson. A simple, but beautiful sketcV 
for any number of children, 12 required. Shows the 
real spirit of Christmas and tells how the glad 
Christmas song was found. Time, 20 to 30 minutes. 
For day schools or church entertainments. Price 25c. 

Mr. Richey Changes His Mind 

By Lee Owen Snook. Story of a crabbed, wealthy 
employer and how at Christmas time the memory of 
his miother changed his attitude toward his employes 
from that of a "driver" to a considerate comrade. An 
unexpected romance develops. 4 males, 4 females, 
and others, either high school or adults. Plays about 
20 minutes. Price, 2dc. 

The Little Stranger 

A moving picture Christmas play, by Edna Randolph 
WorreL. This is really a pantomime, the different 
scenes being either announced or shown on screen by 
stereopticon. 4 scenes "The Night Before Christ- 
mas Home of Orphan Children," "The Little Stran- 
ger at the Door," "The Little Stranger Entertains," 
"Christmas Morning." A pretty entertainment for 
any number of children. Plays about 30 minutes. 25c. 

Ten Good Christmas Pantomimes 

By Ethel Eldridge. A collection that will add novelty 
and effectiveness to your program. Specific direc- 
tions for pantomiming some well-known hymns, songs 
and recitations — "Silent Night," ."Little Town of 
Bethlehem," "When Good Old Kris Comes 'Round," 
"Favorite Carols," etc. Contains the music also. 40c. 

Eldridge Entertainment House 

FRANKLIN, OHIO also DENVER, COLO. 

944 S. Logan St. 



' HALLOWE'EN HIURITY HINTS 

Good Things To Keep The Ball Rolling 

A Bunch of Stunts for Hallowe^en 

A new book of doings, contributed by many wide< 
awake writers. Covers almost any kind of festival, 
party or entertainment you wish to give. Drills, 
games, stunts; decorations, etc^ Price, 75c. 

The Fairy and the Witch 

A 1-act allegorical sketch for Hallowe'en, by A. D. 
Nelson. 1 adult, male or female, and any number of 
children. In this very picturesque little play, the 
Black Witch of Hallowe'en falls under the spell of 
the White Fairy and superstition gives way to rea- 
son. Time, about 20 minutes. Price, 25c. 

The Frolic of the Witches 

By Juanita Mae Gulp. This is a clever little drill es- 
pecially adapted for Hallov/e*en. Introduces flash- 
lights and brooms, and is for 11 girls. Price, 25c. 

Guess Who Song and Drill 

Something novel. Price, 25c. 

The Haunted Gate 

By Edith Wormwood. A clever play for Hallowe'en. 
The capture of the ghosts furnishes a good climax to 
the play. 3 ma'es, 7 females. Plays from 30 to 45 
minutes. Price, 35c. 

Jimmy^s Ghosts 

By Cecil J. Richmond. A sketch for children. Five 
speaking parts with chorus of witches. Can easily be 
given in any school room. Price, 15c 

Scarecrows A-Roaming 

An eccentric drill. Price, 25c. 

What To Do on Hallowe'en 

Compiled by Juanita Mae Culp. This is at really good 
collection of helpful suggestions for this occasion. 
Suggestions for decorations, menus, parties, games, 
stunts, recipes, a play or two, and other good things. 
Purchasers will find themse'ves relieved from worry 
and trouble concerning Hallowe'en. Price, 40c. 

Fun With Fortune Telling 

Compiled by Mrs. G. L. Henson. Here is a book that •, 
will furnish fun and interest for any social gathering. 
Every one is interested in their "fortune" and this 
book is arranged to give you pleasure, either individ- 
ually or as a crowd. Price, 50c. 



Eldridge Entertainment House 

FRANKLIN, OHIO also DENVER, COLO. 

944 S. Logan St. 



=^ 



LIBRARY OF CONGRESS 



New Song-Recitations 



HERE is a list of very clever child- 
impersonations or good encores 
for children. The lines are by 
Margaret Fassitt, the music by Anna 
and Harry C. Eldridge. They will 
be winners on your program. 




ai7 199 323 4 



Both in 

one 
number 

50c 



Ain't It The Limit? ) 

When You Ask About Your Fixins ) 

If Santa Shouldn't Come To Me ) _^^^ 
IVe Been And Had The Measles ) soc 



Both in 

one 
number 



I Wish 1 Had A Ginger-cake 
Our Twins 



Both in 

one 
number 

50c 



When Grandpop Was A Boy j 
When Daddy Took Me Up Y 

In A 'Plane/ 



Both in 

one 
number 

50c 



Eldridge Entertainment House 

also DENVER, COLO. 

944 S. Logan St. 



RANKLIN, OHIO 



